Don't Get It Confused- A Self-Reflection about "Purpose"
God can be so shady sometimes! There I was just sitting in Union College listening as our teacher gave us instructions on our next communications assignment. The topic was “Uniting People With Purpose” and the goal was to be able to present a teaching that could walk an audience through our reasoning of this topic and why it should matter to them. As I sat thinking through what I could possibly talk about, God proceeded to bring back memories of the time when I thought I was united with purpose. Just shady! 😂 But honestly, I couldn’t help but chuckle as God and I walked down memory lane because honey… I really thought 🤣.
I say thought because there’s a lot of things that look and feel like purpose but in the end, it leaves us empty. Empty of joy, empty of impact, empty of fulfillment and meaning… All of us have that itch to make our lives meaningful and don’t get it confused- that desire is God-given. Yet, we try to accomplish it without God.
Because I was confused about what purpose really was, I couldn't unite with it. And boy did it lead to frustration, emotional instability, failed endeavors- all of which could’ve been avoided if I saw purpose the way God defined it. To be frank, I don’t want you to make the same mistake and I don’t take you as someone who likes wasting time either, am I right? So regardless of the Lord’s shade, here are 3 mistakes I made on the journey to purpose and I hope it gives you clarity on your own journey.
The first mistake was this:
1. Don’t Confuse Position as Purpose
When you meet someone for the first time what are the two questions they ask you?
-Who are you?
-What do you do?
Typically, the second question insinuates to a job title, career path or certain position. Our childhood toys (shout out to EasyBake Oven), social norms and school systems all train us towards certain positions in life and emphasize these positions as what gives us purpose. This is why the purpose question always frustrated me. I was a Fashion and MBA graduate, coming from the best school in the game with a 4.0 GPA, and for 3yrs no job title to show for it. It always made me feel like because I didn’t have a position, I didn’t have a purpose.
The problem with confusing our position for our purpose is what happens when our position is gone? When your position is star quarterback and then you lose the use of your legs. Or when your position is a mother and then you lose your only child…How many of us have fallen into depression because we thought when we lost the position, we lost purpose?
I love the story Pastor Zai from Union Church shares of when God revealed her purpose. I can imagine when people used to ask her, “Who are you?” She’d say “I’m P.Z.” “What do you do?” And she’d respond, “Well I’m a nurse.” But then she messed around and discovered purpose and the conversation went more like, “Who are you?” “I’m P.Z.” “What do you do?” “I’m a healer.” That meant no matter the position God gave her- whether as a nurse, a speaker, a mother, a pastor- her God-given purpose could encompass it all and she’d be impactful no matter where she’s placed.
But what about those of us who instead are intimidated by the position? Maybe because we lack the skills or the knowledge required. And now, we feel we lack purpose because we didn’t have what it took or the bravery to step into that position. Kind of like how Moses felt. While in exile, God called him into the position of a Prophet, to speak on behalf of God Himself as the deliverer of Israel. But In Exodus 4:10, Moses replied to God’s call saying, “Master, please, I don’t talk well. I’ve never been good with words, neither before nor after you spoke to me. I stutter and stammer.” Moses didn’t think he was qualified enough to fulfill God’s purpose over his life because he was too focused on the position.
But how did God reply? He replied with, “Ok cool, I’ll move the position but I’m not moving your purpose. Your brother Aaron will speak on your behalf but I have purposed Israel’s deliverance through you, Moses!” (My personal interpretation of Exodus 4:14-17)
God can use anyone in any position, whether high or low, known or unknown, to accomplish His purpose- a lawyer, a fisherman, a widow, a king- Because God-given purpose is never defined by our position. Our position is defined by our purpose.
2. Don’t Confuse The Perception of Purpose
Pastor Brian from Union Church brought this concept home perfectly. (It’s a must watch, so check it out here). Now, I’m not sure if he peeked into my notes 👀 (lol!) but the point I will be stealing back is this: God-given purpose isn’t always glamorous.
The white picket fence American dream we’ve all been sold teaches us that the proof of walking in purpose are the material assets we gain. Think about it, if you see a man with a Rolex watch, you think to yourself “that guy looks very accomplished” and ascribe value to him even though you have no clue what he’s done. But if you see a guy with one of those clunky old Sketchers-looking watches you don’t think anything of him. Be honest, we’ve all thought it! That’s because we’re human and as humans we make a lot of judgements based on how someone/something looks. (1 Samuel 16:17) So because we’re more attracted to how things look, it makes sense that if purpose doesn’t look like Fergie and Ludacris’ music video, we don’t want it.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that walking in God-given purpose will not result in or look like nice cars and fancy vacations but it will not look like that all the time. We have to have a sober understanding of purpose and evaluate if we’re allowing pop culture and people to influence what purpose looks like in our lives more than we are allowing God’s word to do so. The problem with confusing purpose based solely on perceived appearance is that we may not get the outcome we were hoping for.
Purpose fulfilled looked like Jesus bleeding on the cross in one season and then sitting at the right hand of God in all glory and majesty in the next. For Pastor Brian, It looked like packing a tacky brown paper lunch bag every single day in one season and then living debt free in the next. Neither of these experiences looked glamorous at a point in time, but Romans 8:28 tells us God-given purpose always produces for our good no matter what the season looks like.
3. Don’t Confuse The Plan of Purpose
You ever ask yourself what is all of this for? Clocking in and out. Running from here to there. Is it just so we can rack up all the money we can and retire early under palm trees in Florida?
I’m not going to lie, it does sound fantastic- working hard enough so that I don’t have to work anymore, living for myself and not having a care in the world. Come to think of it, I actually did do that…and there was no fulfillment in it at all.
Here’s the main point of this reflection: The ultimate mistake we can make about purpose is insisting on choosing our own way instead of God’s. Picking purpose defined by our own positions, our own perceptions, and our own plans. The astounding thing is that because God gives us free will, we can create our own purpose, but only His fulfills.
And let me tell you there’s nothing more fulfilling than when you’re able to transform someone else's life for the better. Knowing that through leading a Connect Group, I’ve helped someone see hope past their anxiety or by making the sacrifice to give generously someone else can keep their lights on too. The plan of God-given purpose is not so that we can be blessed and keep it to ourselves, but to be blessed SO THAT we could be a blessing to others. That way, we live to display His love for us through helping one another.
Trust me, it doesn’t feel good when you realize maybe you’ve made some mistakes chasing the wrong purpose. Money, energy, and time all seem wasted. But can I tell you something amazing? Our God is not only the creator of time but He’s the redeemer of time. Joel 2:25 says “God will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten”. As long as you’re living there’s still time to make a change. So don’t sit in that guilt! Recognize it. Then pivot. That’s all repentance means-pivot and turn back to God’s way. He’s ready to do something new in your life and the desires that you have, only He can fulfill them with no sorrow added.
If that sounds like a life you’d like to live then let’s go ahead and make that change! And if you’re reading this and you want to live a fulfilled life but don’t know Jesus, don’t worry - He knows you and He loves you so much that He purposed his life on earth to be the sacrifice paid for your sins. He died for you so that you could live and live life fully. All you have to do to walk in new life is to receive Him as Lord and Savior in your heart right now.
If you just made that decision, heaven and I are celebrating! You know, we welcome new family on this THF journey of ours so don’t be shy to meet back on the blog, DM me an “I holla!”, or hang with us on the Podcast. We’d love to meet you! Most importantly, make sure to join the community at your local Bible-believing church (if you’re in the DMV, come through to Union!!) and watch what God will do through you!
Much love,
Nyorh
